I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
