some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
