Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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