I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
