Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
