Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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