No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Randomize
