hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
