My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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