dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Randomize
