This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
dude. I can hear the air.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
