You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
