Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
