Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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