can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
