id be glad to
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
