I'm going to jail i love you
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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