we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
