if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
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