I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
