Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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