I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
