I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Even my vagina gasped.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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