dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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