Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Randomize
