my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
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