The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
You can't just leave with hair like that
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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