Non-Jews are for practice
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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