walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Randomize
