He asked to "fluff my boner.."
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize
