If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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