# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
