Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Never joke about your clitoris.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
