I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Randomize
