Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize