Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize