Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Randomize
