No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Hippo gnu deer
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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