yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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