I'm so fucking centered right now
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
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