BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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