We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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