hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
the day after is always just damage control
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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