Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
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