haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
