Sorry, I don't speak sober.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
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