She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
