why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
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