I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
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