this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
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