I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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